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Man, losing weight sucks. I know that’s not exactly a world-shattering statement, but it’s true. Have you ever looked at the calorie amounts on food? If it tastes nice, chances are it’s going to propel you right past your calorie target for the day. I’m getting by fine on fruit and other healthy snacks, but every now and then, you can’t help craving a doughnut. Point being, the code for Fitness Boxing feat HATSUNE MIKU came at a most opportune time, even if my general feeling towards Vocaloids is one of supreme indifference. Still, there’s potential for added charm.
The first question I want to answer, before I delve into the particulars of the game itself, is does it actually qualify as exercise? Well, before the first day of exercise it told me to get water and a towel. I ignored it. I did not ignore it again. So, yes, it’s exercise. Which is odd, from a review standpoint. Never reviewed a game where the main limiting factor is my own body. Still, this experience taught me three things: there is potential in games like these, sometimes adding in famous characters doesn’t really do much, and I am horribly out of shape.
The Old One-Two
I can’t really approach Fitness Boxing feat HATSUNE MIKU the same way I approach other games. I could go down and complete all of the various exercise routines, but then they’d be reading this review out at my funeral. Fortunately, Fitness Boxing has a mode it calls ‘Daily Workout’, which puts together a series of exercises for you, based on what intensity you’re feeling for that day. I resolved to do a week of these daily workouts and then report back on my experiences. To my slight suprise, my overall feeling is actually quite positive. I reliably worked up a sweat each day and my suffering muscles are, hopefully, a sign that it’s doing some good.
The game itself is, in essence, a rhythm game combined with motion controls. Each workout session has three bits. Firstly, the warmup, where you stretch your muscles out. Then you usually move onto a basic workout. You’ll need to do the appropriate punch – jab, hook, uppercut, etc – with the right timing. It usually eases you into doing full combos. Then come the music sections, featuring licensed Vocaloid tracks. Hatsune Miku is joined by Kagarime Len and Rin, and Megurine Luka. If that means anything to you. These challenge you to throw punches and dodge to the beat. They usually destroyed me.
The result is quite a bit of variation for each day. I started off with basic one-two combos. By the end of the week I was combining them with hooks and uppercuts for a full combo. The next one should start to incorporate ducking. That helped me keep coming back to Fitness Boxing feat HATSUNE MIKU. There’s quite a lot of depth to things too. There’s a big library of songs to unlock, for instance, which you can acquire by playing. Also, costumes for your favourite Vocaloid. More importantly, it can keep track of calories burned as well as giving you a nice graph for your weight. It even tracks your BMI, which is as depressing as it is helpful.
Fitness Limitations
Still, there are some significant limitations to Fitness Boxing feat HATSUNE MIKU. The biggest one is also the most obvious: it doesn’t really know what you’re doing with those Switch controllers. I’m no expert on motion controls, but it feels like it’s only really recording the fact that you’ve quickly moved the Switch controller in front of you. So, if you screw up and throw a straight instead of an uppercut, it’ll still count. I was getting ‘Perfects’, even when I was desperately flailing. There’s also something strange about the timing. Your punch needs to land, not begin, when the icon is in the right place. So you have to get used to punching a second before you think you have to.
There are other issues too. For one, I hope your TV is mounted on a wall at head height. Otherwise you’re going to get some serious neck ache trying to figure out what punch to throw next. The instructor, who I’ll talk about in a moment, gives you a heads up on which punch is coming during the basic workouts. During the musical segments? You have to stare at the screen to know what you’re throwing next. Makes it hard to get into the rhythm at times. The songs being licensed, rather than custom built around the gameplay, means that it’s hard to just hear what to do next. An audio key per punch would be better.
I’ve not spoken much about the Hatsune Miku half of Fitness Boxing feat HATSUNE MIKU, in part because I’m not really the target audience for vocaloids. Having Hatsune Miku tell me I look cool, while in the reflection of the TV I can see my sweaty, flabby form, does not charge up my motivation. That said, I do like that the Vocaloids model the actions you need to take, especially in the stretches. Oddly, though, the Vocaloids aren’t your instructors. That privilege goes to a pair of strange sounding individuals. Their voices sound oddly speech-to-text, which didn’t fill me with confidence. They do the job well enough, but they’re no personal trainers.
Fitness Boxing feat HATSUNE MIKU – A Positive Experience
I said near the beginning that I felt my experience was positive. I stand by that. While there are issues with Fitness Boxing feat HATSUNE MIKU, it achieves what it sets out to do: get me up and moving. Shadow boxing is a decent fitness technique, after all, and this just takes it a step further. The calorie tracker is handy for losing weight and, ultimately, it’s quite fun exercising to music – whether it’s to my taste or not. That said, the way it recognises punches means it has no way of checking your form. If you’re going to do this long-term, it might be worth getting some lessons from a real human, so you don’t throw your neck out or something.
To close this off, I must admit something. I went into Fitness Boxing feat HATSUNE MIKU with an air of dismissiveness. Not only towards the Vocaloids but also towards the concept. I’ve not really been one for this sort of thing. To be honest, my thoughts are kind of turned around on the subject. Gamifying exercise seems to have some merit. I’m even considering slotting it into my exercise regime going forwards. Maybe if I throw enough punches, I can justify that doughnut.
